Grandma Henke

Alice was telling how she felt last week when she had a day without electricity … “with nothing else to do, we eyed our office and computers wistfully”.      Can you imagine how hard it would be to have computers and Internet taken away permanently?   Ewwwwwww.     Without email and instant messenger how could we “connect to the people who matter most”?    

I’d rather give up pantyhose than the Internet …  but then  who wouldn’t?   Anybody over fifty has already switched to knee highs anyway, unless they have the need for control tops now and then.   (Why do they call them Control Tops when we all know they are for controlling bottom?)  

This has nothing to do with the Internet but I heard a joke in church today.   I really heard it the first time a long time ago but I forgot to tell it to anyone before I forgot it.

It seems there was a young man who worked at a grocery store and an elderly lady asked him if he would sell her a half a head of cabbage.   “I don’t think we can sell a half a head of cabbage,” he told her, “but I’ll check with my supervisor.”    He went into the back and told his supervisor, “There’s this crazy old lady out front who wants to buy a half a head of cabbage.”    He didn’t realize she had followed him to the back when he said that so when he saw her he quickly added, “And this sweet little lady wants to buy the other half.”    

The manager took him aside and said, “That was quick thinking there.   Where are you from anyway?”     The young man said, “I’m from Canada where the women are ugly and the hockey players are beautiful.”     “My wife is from (un named place),” said his supervisor.    “Oh really,” said the young man.  “What position does she play?”  

This coming Tuesday is my first painting class … ever.    I’m a little apprehensive, but the teacher assures me that this project is one “anybody can do”.  It will be so embarrassing if “anybody” can do it but I can’t.    As my little grand daughter, Abby, says, “Scawwy”.   We’re painting cute, fluffy little bunnies.   The ones I can draw consist of two circles, six whiskers, two dots for eyes, a little nose, two big ears and another circle for the tail.  There is nothing fluffy (or cute) about them.  If it weren’t for the ears you wouldn’t know they were rabbits.  They actually look an awful lot like the cats and dogs I draw.     

I’ve got to edit my book and not let it just sit there collecting dust.  Actually, it isn’t collecting dust since it’s on the hard drive of my computer (and for added safety a little memory stick).   But, speaking of dust … I better add that to my “to do” list while I’m thinking about it.

And speaking of “to do lists” at the top of mine is “Quit eating sugar and white flour”.   It would sure be nice to be one of those people with a metabolism that keeps ahead of their appetite.   I know people like that.  I try not to like them but most of them are decent people if you can overlook their active metabolisms.    If anything is not fair in this life it’s the inequality of metabolisms and appetites.      (I say this as I find the last crook of the candy cane from my Christmas stocking.)

Oh great … I just realized that my clock battery died.    Here I thought I was going to get to bed before midnight for a change, too.    Another thing for the list … replace battery on clock and check fire alarms.   (You thought I was going to say “get to bed before midnight” didn’t you?)  Ha!   

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